Halloween Fantasies: The Women

Yesterday I asked if I should include a blog post for women in Halloween costumes. After a resounding silence, I figured, "what the heck". Keep in mind that, unlike the previous blog post that depicted my fantasies about costumes I'd like to wear (if I was built for it), this blog contains my fantasies for costumes I'd like to see women wear (if they have the bodies for it). Consider this blog post definitely not "PC".

Harley Quinn

Harley is my favorite bad girl. I know, Catwoman has a lot more class, but Harley just seems really fun...when she's not trying to kill you. This is a fantasy and, in real life, I'd drop Harley like an angry rattlesnake and start running, but in the safety of my imagination, I think she's really HAWT. Found a pic of a model in costume that I think shows how the Harley costume would appear in real life.

I found something else at the Fan Art Exhibit blog. Apparently, there was an online April Fool's gag that depicted actress Kristen Bell made up as Harley for a supposed appearence in The Dark Knight (2008) . I don't think Bell's Harley looks as fun as the one from the Batman animated series, though. She seems kind of sad. Makes you want to take her under your (Bat) wing, doesn't it?

Supergirl

What can I say? Supergirl is one of the ultimate sex fantasies for Superhero fan boys. Smallville fans have come to think of actress Laura Vandervoort as the Supergirl, but she has many incarnations. The one thing I don't understand is how you're expected to read the "S" on her chest with all of the "distortion"?

Power Girl

Even more than Supergirl, to pull off this costume takes quite a set of "attributes" not possessed by most women. After all, how can a woman be so big on top and so thin elsewhere? It's like expecting a real life woman to have the proportions of a Barbie doll or Jessica Rabbit. It just can't be done. At least Supergirl has a more or less realistic frame that could be attained by a human being (with a lot of exercise and dieting). Nevertheless, she remains a popular male fantasy.

Batgirl

There are so many versions of Batgirl, I don't know where to begin, but I decided on the version that has the most mystery while still retaining the male fantasy factor. As you can see, this Batgirl has had an encounter with the Huntress (supposedly the daughter of Batman and Catwoman) and guess who didn't win the battle?

I couldn't find a pic of a Batgirl costume on a live model I felt gave a satisfying appearance and that was also printable on my blog (no pr0n, please), so you'll have to be satisfied with the graphic.

I know, I know. So many other fantasy super women to choose from. Catwoman and Wonder Woman are obvious favorites, which is probably why I decided not to include them (except for the brief homage to Selena below). Frankly, just about every woman in costume these days sports at least C-cup sized breasts which is amazing considering how they don't seem to get in the way during a fight. They also have waists that are supernaturally thin, so it's hard to believe these women even eat (though, by definition, they do burn a lot of calories during their various battles and jumping around buildings and such). Another woman who could have appeared here was the slave girl Leia from Return of the Jedi (1983), but based on Carrie Fisher's admission of using cocaine on the set of The Empire Strikes Back (1980), one wonders if the body of the bikini clad Leia was crafted less by workouts with a trainer and more by "nose candy".

That's it for now. Choose your favorite costume and go for it this Sunday. Happy. Have fun.

Halloween Fantasies

Who do you want to be when you grow up...uh, that is, who do you want to be for Halloween? I guess I should ask, what sort of costume do you want to have for Halloween? If you're into the superhero, science fiction, or fantasy genres, chances are, who you'd like to be would look totally lame in real life. Let's face it, unless you've hit Gold's Gym every day for the past ten years and have been a food nazi about your diet for the same amount of time, your body isn't perfect. That means you're going to have some bulges and lumps in that skin tight superhero costume where you don't want to have them.

That said, this is a blog about fantasies and dreams, not real life. Here, you can be anything and do anything. Here's my wish list for Halloween costumes. Don't worry. All of them are fantasies. No way I could pull this off in reality.

Superman

No, I don't mean the modern incarnations of the Man of Steel. I want to dress up as the old George Reeves Superman. Here's the trick. I want to do it in black and white. I once saw a photo of a group of Santa Clauses on parade. All of them were in color except one, who was totally black and white. Naturally I thought it was PhotoShopped, but then I found out the actor dressed in a graytone costume and had her (yeah, a thin, hot, female Santa) skin painted. She looked completely like a black and white photo but the color was real. That's how I'd like to show up as the Last Son of Krypton...like Superman in film noir.

Moon Knight

Moon Knight is one of the lesser known Marvel superheroes but I think he's completely underrated. For one thing, the guy has three different identities, actually four including his hero persona (rich guy, cab driver, mercenary, and Moon Knight). Not only that, but he's an Egyptian god's avatar on Earth, which isn't always a good thing. Yeah, it would be tough to pull off a totally white costume as an "avenger-by-night" (and not look like a Klan member), but the look and the identity are so totally awesome that it would be fantastic for Halloween (and remember, we're talking total fantasy, here).

The Sandman

There are so many different versions of The Sandman, but in this case, I'm talking about the 1930s alter ego of Wesley Dodds, a reclusive entrepreneur who by night, enters the realm of pulp fiction in the manner of The Shadow and the Phantom as a figure of dark mystery to fight crime and corruption in pre-World War II New York. Sure, the mask makes him look like the Elephant Man, but if you get past that, he's scary as hell if you encounter him suddenly in a dark room, he talks in mysterious riddles, and in the Sandman Mystery Theatre series, he leaves origami calling cards.

Halloween fantasies. Got one? Let's hear about it.

Oh, and should I do a Halloween fantasy costume blog post for women? Just asking.

Happy Time Travel Day!

For those of you who may have missed it, October 26th is official Time Travel Day. In fact, today marks the 25th anniversary of the first trip in time, at least by a Delorean fitted with the flux capacitor invented by the now famous Dr. Emmett "Doc" Brown.

In the original Back to the Future (1985) film, Marty is accidentally sent back in time over 30 years on October 26th, 1985. That makes today the 25th anniversary of Marty's trip. Of course, Doc's dog Einstein makes the first trip in time to exactly one minute into the future, but Marty is the first human time traveler. For 25 years, Marty, Doc, Jennifer, and a score of others have been entertaining us with warmth, humor, and adventure as they get themselves into and out of the messes caused by having access to a time machine. And we wouldn't have it any other way.



So hop in your Deloreans, get ready to speed up to 88 miles per hour, and we can all meet and party in 1999, just for giggles.

Oh, another anniversary is fast approaching. On November 5th, 1955, Marty arrived as the first time traveler to visit the past in the Doc's Delorean. That'll make November 5th this year the 55th anniversary of this event. Of course, it's also the day Doc Brown invented time travel.

Anyone up for partying at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance?

Batteries Not Included

OK, that phrase has been used, but I just got my first look at the new Power Battery design for the upcoming Green Lantern (2011) film thanks to ComicBookMovie.com and I must say I think it sucks. Sure, films aren't obligated to stick very tightly to the original comic book designs and in many cases (such as Batman's costume) they definitely shouldn't. On the other hand, the producers of the Green Lantern film don't seem to mind trying to impose their version of "alien" on the rest of us, as first revealed in the costume design, while rolling way over the top of what seems to look even reasonably heroic.

I've posted the current film version of the battery (upper left) along with the classic version (middle right), plus Kyle Raynor's power battery (bottom). I can understand that the original comic book design probably looks too Terrestrial for a modern film, but I'd have preferred the "alien-ness" of Kyle's battery over what the film designers finally came up with. What do you think?

Smallville Homecoming: Time Warp Factor 10

I just read KryptonSite's Advanced Review of tonight's Smallville episode Homecoming. It's against the rules for me to quote from KryptonSite's review, but I came away with the distinct impression that "Homecoming" will be Smallville's attempt to wrap up the ten year journey from Clark Kent to Superman in a nice package with a bow. I don't mean to be frivolous in my comments. Let me explain.

Ten years is a long time. When Smallville first launched, there was no way to guarantee that the show would last more than a few seasons. In the early days, was there really a long-term plan for plot and character development? There have no doubt been changes of course over the span of the series. It might be hard to keep track of everything, particularly for the fans.

Enter "Homecoming". Now that the end of the series is certain, just about everyone involved with the show, from the fans, to the cast, to the production crew, must be reflecting back over the last ten years and what they're supposed to mean. Was it just a really fun and lucrative ride that's now about over, or has something enduring been created? What does it all amount to?

That's what Homecoming is about...a way, not only to track the key events of the past ten years, but to see how they'll come out in their ultimate and logical conclusion...from awkward high school student Clark Kent, to Superman, the Man of Steel; the Last Son of Krypton. KryptonSite's review is very positive, which is a good thing after last week's disappointing Supergirl episode. We need to believe that Season 10 will be among the best and that the show will end as well as it began.

I won't tip my hand to even the spoilers revealed by KryptonSite, but one of the major characters I was hoping would show up in this retrospective won't be present. I can only hope this means a surprise reappearence later this season. The one thing I want this experience to give Clark (thanks to Brainiac 5), is a clearer sense of purpose and a reduction or maybe even elimination of his doubts. It's crunch time. He puts on the costume in less than a year. He can't afford to keep moping around if he hopes to face Darkseid and defeat him. The battle isn't Kara's...it's Superman's.

To Heck with Zod! Kneel Before Kal-El

I know, I know. It's probably been done, but I just thought it would be a fun image to put together and I found the right font. Bet the ladies will really like it.

Supergirl? Not So Much

Ubergirl? Power Girl? Annoying Girl? What the heck was Laura Vandervoort doing on Smallville, anyway?

It's not that I don't think she's attractive or a good fit for the Kara/Supergirl role, but Smallville's recent episode Supergirl seemed like a jumbled mess.

OK, I get that Darkseid has come to Earth (though in a radically different form than in the comic books) to cause havoc and generally be a pain in the neck, but when did Jor-El suddenly start being Kara's promotional manager and turning over the safety of our planet to her?

Clark has been on Earth all his life. He knows who humans are. He knows what sort of hero we need. Kara grew up on Krypton and spent most of Clark's life in suspended animation at the bottom of a lake. She's had at most just a couple of years of experience with Earth and with people, and now she's an expert?

Also, Jor-El usually tells Clark when he's blowing him off and usually does something nasty like take away his powers, just to prove that dead guys still have pull. It must have been really painful to hear from your bratty blonde cousin that "Daddy doesn't love you anymore."

The writing seemed very inconsistent in the episode. The return of Lois to Metropolis and to Clark seemed more understated than it should have been. True, Lois was in fine form (literally) when she went after possessed "shock jock" Gordon Godfrey. She's normally that much of a pit bull and I have to admit, just dumb enough not to run with the pictures while the bad guy is still in handcuffs. I even liked the kinky outfit she chose to model, but it all seemed just a little too contrived. Does Darkseid really need to blow off some steam at the local S & M club while he's planning on taking over the world?

The whole "Kara bracelet repelling Darkseid" thing seemed to belong in a Saturday morning cartoon rather than a prime-time science fiction/fantasy program. Again, contrived. Oh, and why are both Kara and Lois (Lois?) "pure of heart" but not Super Boy Scout Clark? Don't tell me that Lois doesn't have conflicts and doubts and if Kara just came back from an unsuccessful trip to find her Mom, how can she not be experiencing internal conflicts and issues?

I can understand, given her "mission", why Kara would choose a costume to "perform" in public, but how did she end up at a photo shoot modeling the thing? She had time to go to a modeling agency, convince them to promote her, and do a shoot of Metropolis's latest superhero? That entire sequence was amazingly lame and designed only to show off her rather fabulous body. In other words, "eye candy filler" (not that I'm above such things, but it really contributed nothing to the story).

Hooray! Clark flew! Boo! It lasted about five seconds. Kara acts like it's some sort of Zen exercise to fly. It's just like any other power. He just has an Earth person's fear of falling, even though he's fallen plenty of times and knows it won't hurt.

Kara acts more like Jor-El than Kara, being punitive of Clark rather than trying to relate. It does make sense to have them both team up to defeat Darkseid. Bracelet aside, she might not be able to beat him alone.

Oh. Linda Lee Danvers. Clark Kent in drag. Laura Vandervoort looked like she was wearing a wig, fake glasses, and a frumpy costume straight out of wardrobe. I wasn't convinced for a second that she was a "real" person. No one else would be either. So much for having a "secret identity".

About the best part of the episode was the Green Arrow subplot. I know a lot of fans didn't like Ollie's presence and felt it was a distraction, but he was meant to mirror Clark's own doubts. Both Clark and Ollie were expressing worries and concerns about "working in the shadows" and the distrust the public has over "masked vigilantes" operating in Metropolis. Lois acted as the fulcrum between the two heroes and by the end of the episode, they had each chosen different directions. Clark will remain an unknown face as "the Blur", while Oliver at a press conference at the end of the episode declares, "I am Green Arrow".

The only "incredible" part of the GA subplot is how all of the reporters instantly believed Ollie was telling the truth. He didn't even produce his GA costume, bow, and trick arrows. It reminded me both of Tony Stark's (Robert Downey Jr) admission at the end of the first Iron Man film and of Harvey Dent's (Aaron Eckhart) "confession", "I am the Batman". Yeah, in the latter case, he was lying, but the reporters bought it then, too.

I watched Supergirl knowing it was panned in the reviews, but when you're a fan, you watch even the bad episodes, looking for a glimmer of hope.

Dear Smallville writers. We need a better episode next time, gang.

Is This Guy Clark Kent?

Look at the guy on the comic book page and then look below at the guy in the photo. Look closely. See the resemblance? Is it the same guy? Remember, Clark Kent is NOT Pretty!